Going into this season I expected pain and for the first 16 or so games...it was. But They fought back through the ups and downs and everything to giev us a fun season. I know it's very similar to seasons of old but I'm thinking this team has a brighter future than we thought...baring any stupid moves.
"Did you say you want stupid moves?"
****.
On to the players.
Andre" Iggy/CheifBlocka/DYMB/Worst Human being on the planet" Iguodala.
What can we say that hasn't been said ( a bazillion times). Iggy there were times in which you were on point and otehr in which I wished death upon you...wait no I'm not Westbrook....well you get the point. I'm thinking that that last quarter was your last in a Sixer Uni....In fact this game personified yoru whole game...Occasionally flashy but has more wholes than Sony's PSN security. See you in a <insert team here> jersey next year. It's been fun.
Grade: B-....maybe a C+.
Elton "Thug" Brand
Elton I'll admit...I didn't want you here. I wanted Josh Smith so for the last 3 seasons I had this douchey I told you so face on....but like that Duke girl you sure shut me up ( please don't kill me...). You played like a man and at times gave this team that needed mean streak. Too bad you couldn't make Hawes into a man...but good season. You're not going anywhere so see ya next season...just repeat what you did this one...please?
Grade: B+
Jrue"Caliswag"Holiday
Is Jrue the future? I dunno. There's one school of thought that says since he hasn't shown superstar status abilities that he won't ever be one. The other school says....He's 20. I wonder which one is true. Jrue had some excellent stretches during the season but there were also moments of pure chaos that may many a fanboy jump on his bandwagon. But this Series has allowed the nation to see that the kid got game....perhaps that'll lead to some Stern tactics next season..jus sayin.
Grade:B
Thadeous " Baddeous/ Terrel Owens/ Pubic Goatee/ Dunkz Hawd 2.0" Young
IMO Thad made some major strides this year, some say he's found his niche I say he can get even better. Less derp derp on defense this year and less 3's equals better Thad. If he can add that jumper next season...look out. Too bad we will overpay him and then a poster name FSJS will start acting as if he killed his puppy or something but still good show.
Grade:B
Louis"I Get Cake/ David Lee gave me my soul back/ Imma Boss/Natural JerriCurl" Williams
Lou found his niche and if he can stop with the random pumpfake into throw the ball at Turner/Brand **** and not have his annual I get hurt moment, he's a keeper or maybe he isn't...but get this without him we'd get swept..or **** not even be in the playoffs. So is he that replaceable? <Cue posts of various other gunners>....ok..ok. Yeah but still isn't it nice to have one? We got rid of Korver thinking that we could just replace him...now he's off hitting clutch shot, gettin money, **** bitches. So be careful what you wish for.
Grade: B- for Good Lou....C- for bad Lou.
Jodie "Da Gawd" Meeks
All hail, Jodie...he only allowed the heat to go on to the next round so they could taste the epic failure of defeat...he is a merciful yet strick god.
All seriousness though Meeks was a season saving find..his ability to stretch the floor was a godsend ( or should I say a Meeksend?....ok no...Please don't send me to hell). Hopefully he;s coming off the bench next year but as Kerr said he's a very solid player with a skill that this team needs.
Grade: A++++++.....seriously though B+.
Spencer"Hawesome/ Softer than Wiz Khalifa/Michael Phelps/Hair Gelz" Hawes.
Man Hawes is an inigma...One week you hate the guy...then you think he's turned the corner...and then he sucks. He's the nba M.Night Shamilingadingdong player...you wonder if he was ever here in the first place..I like the guy for a few games but...yeah no thanks. See you elsewhere son.
Grade: C-
and finally
Evan "Emo/ The Villian(such a stupid nickname..and this is coming from me)/I getz blocked/ ReggieMiller Pest Swag"Turner
Major dissapointment with a silver lining. Evan Turner is the LASERS of the NBA, not what you thoug/wanted it to be but yet when you stepped back you realized that it's okay. Turner had a good series and that makes me feel better about next season but..yeah this season was a fail for the guy. I know...bu-but he was mishandle...perhaps but still Turner has a lot of whole in his games that perhaps we cannot fix. That being said I'm not going to ignore the good either. kid has that swag about him...but he needs to just drive to the goddam rim and take that Brandon Roy explosion traing or the Iggy steroid challenge whatever just train hard over the offseason. Next season the excuses are done. Good finish though...i loved you trollage of LeBron.
Grade: Incomplete.
The others:
Andres " I fight bears" Nocioni : Tough Mofo without a game...here next season but...hopefully not too much clock.
Jason" Nathan Drake" Kapono: lol...some shooter. How the hell can he teach anyone how to shoot?
Mareese "Dumber than a bag of rocks" Speights: Derps when he should have herp'd
Tony"Old man Swag"Batie: Successful annual old guy signing.
Antonio "Wait wut?" Daniels: So pointless
Craig"D-League"Brackins: I wouldn't be surprised if he's thrown in a random trade.
The Coach:
Douglas"Dougie/That Idiot/ Fo 2.0/Sir Hugslot" Collins
I love what Doug brought to this team. He was perfect..until the end there, His rotation was solid until he decided to put Nocioni back in it and his "mishandling" of Turner might put some peopel off but still he got the most out of this squad. Last year or **** even the Mo/Delio years this team would have gave up but not this team they constantly fought all season ( Game 2 and Bull game withstanding). That being said, the constant fail at the end of games as well as some pretty bad desicions cannot happen next year. Time for you to stop being the bridesmaid Doug...be the bride...wait wat?
Grade: B
The Season.
This season was fun and yet frustrating at the same time. We have returned to where we were two seasons ago. The moves we make are crucial. We cannot settle and make scotch tape fixes. If they want to compete then make major moves... otherwise continue the rebuild. Luckily we have someone competent at the wheels...
"Did you say competent?"
SHIIIIIIIIT.
Either way I have some slight enthusiasm about the future, the ball is in their court now..they just have to make the right pass.
See yall this offseason..should be a doozy.
