RealGM

Okay for real, I don't really do the eye candy thing usually, but she's a fitness nut...
and she's just so damned cute

: Hi Byron! Wow, what a great chance to meet with you, glad you finally made it!

: Well, I know I was supposed to be here an hour ago, but I was in an unfortunate accident on my way here.

: Oh no! What happened!

: Well if you must know, I rear ended someone. My brakes didn't work.

: That's terrible! Do you know what happened with your brakes?

: Well, they just didn't try enough. I can only tell the brakes what to do, I can't make them work.

: Wait... you did actually press your foot down though right?

: I shouldn't have to. These brakes have been brought up through the system, they're supposed to be good working breaks. If they don't try, well, that's not on me.

: I... uh...

: I even showed the brakes a video of a car stopping. I don't know what else I can do.

: Yeah... moving on... why don't you take us through a typical Lakers practice?

: Well after smoothies, I get the team to spread out across the floor. Once they're in their spots, I have them stand and take deep breaths for the next ten minutes.

: Ah yes! A page out of Phil Jackson's book! Meditation is supposed to be great for clearing the mind of distractions!

: Meditationing? You're trippin. That's the offence. Then I get Kobe to shoot half court shots with the whole team guarding him. Then we break for lunch.

: Is that... is that it? You don't run them through drills or anything?

: Of course I do. I have a judo instructor who teaches Roy how to roll properly, I have D'Angelo studying the history of the NBA from day 1, and I have Julius run into dummy tackles.

: Speaking of coaching, you're going to be up against the Raptors and Dwane Casey next! He has some very similar coaching tendencies to you. What do you plan to do when he crosses his arms on the sideline and gives a stern look?

: Oh, now that is a good question. I plan to also cross my arms and give a stern look too, but with a hint of disinterest in the game.

: Now that's some savvy! What if he starts pacing up and down the sideline?!

: Oh, if he starts doing that, well I'm just going to have to point at something. Like maybe the net. That's where the ball should be going.

: Well, Jason Kidd didn't lead the Nets to the finals for nothing! Best of luck Byron! Maybe that lazy bum Jakay can be arsed to eventually do another game thread and we can talk again!

: I sure hope not

: Great! Bye!