Why Miami sucks (a green thread)

truthiness · Post #1 » by **truthiness** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 11:38 am

I want you to tell me why Miami sucks.

And in order to support NBA's green initiative, everything in this thread should be considered to be in green font (just in case there were any doubts).

I will start:

The Heat sucks because it's ruining the league, because there will be no more parity. Now you will start seeing these stacked teams. It's so bad it's not only affecting the future of the league, but its past, too. I mean look at all the teams the Heat helped create:

- Bill Russell's Celtics with 7 HOFers on the team
- 3 top 50 all time players on the Lakers: West, Elgin Baylor, Wilt Chamberlain + HOFer Gail Goodrich
- 3 top 50 all time players on the Lakers (AGAIN): Magic, Kareem, Worthy
- 2 top 50 all time players on the Celtics: Bird, McHale + 2 HOFers: Dennis Johnson, Robert Parish
- 3 top 50 all time players on the Celtics: Bird, McHale, Walton + 2 HOFers: Dennis Johnson, Robert Parish
- 2 top 50 all time players on the Bulls: Jordan, Pippen + HOFer and best rebounder ever Rodman
- 1 top 50 all time player on Detroit: Isiah + 2 HOFers: Dumars and Rodman
- 2 top 50 all time players on the Sixers: Moses Malone and Dr J
- 2 top 50 all time players on the Spurs: David Robinson and Tim Duncan
- 2 top 50 all time players on the Rockets: Hakeem and Drexler

Not to mention all the teams that the Heat helped create but failed to win, like:

- 3 top 50 all time players on the Rockets: Hakeem, Barkley and Pippen

The Heat even made Barkley want to team up with other good players to look for a ring. I know, disgusting.

Because of the Heat small market teams won't be able to get FA anymore. That's because players will want to replicate what Lebron and Wade did: they refused small market teams like NY and Chicago to go play in the biggest market on the planet - no, in the galaxy - Miami.

That's another one of those things that affect the past.
This is why Miami is to blame for Shaq leaving Orlando and going to LA.
Also, as Bulls fans know too well, it's Miami's fault no big name FA wanted to play for their small market team in 2000 and they chose big markets like San Antonio and Orlando.

HIF · Post #2 » by **HIF** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 12:21 pm

stupid thread

truthiness · Post #3 » by **truthiness** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 2:38 pm

HIF wrote:stupid thread

geeee, thanks.
you're always such a darling.

it's cute of you to contribute to what basically intended to be a collection of all the crap people talked during the past year.

i could have done this on the GB, but we all know i'd have been suspended for "trolling" ... that's what calling people on their BS is known as on the GB

jmbflame21 · Post #4 » by **jmbflame21** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 3:21 pm

DrVanNostrand · Post #5 » by **DrVanNostrand** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 5:26 pm

truthiness's Win % : 1.000

Post #6 » by **unowen85** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 8:03 pm

Michael Jordan was the first Dwyane Wade.

BigDaddyPR · Post #7 » by **BigDaddyPR** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 8:22 pm

Damn HIF, i think you of all people should be happy at this time of the season, Spo is doing a pretty good darn job and Anthony is not a joke anymore. Thats was a little uncalled for.... lol!!

truthiness · Post #8 » by **truthiness** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 8:29 pm

unowen85 wrote:Michael Jordan was the first Dwyane Wade.

you should post this on the bulls board. it will make their heads explode with rage. wait, i'll get the camera ...

Miamis3rdRing · Post #9 » by **Miamis3rdRing** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 8:29 pm

HIF wrote:stupid thread

Stupid reply.
---
You basically summarized the feelings of the GB population.

On a related note, I love how people are crying for parity, when the truth is only a handful of teams have ever won a championship, and far fewer have won 2+.

BadMofoPimp · Post #10 » by **BadMofoPimp** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 8:40 pm

Miami sucks because if you take 95 south until it ends, you have to jump onto US1 and go through that horrible city traffic for miles to get to the south side of Miami. It can take forever.

TheDon008 · Post #11 » by **TheDon008** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 9:04 pm

Miami Sucks because of the white sandy beaches and beautiful latin women always trying to have sex with me...

BadMofoPimp · Post #12 » by **BadMofoPimp** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 9:09 pm

Miami sucks because I keep getting beat up by Latino guys for having sex with their Latino women.

TheDon008 · Post #13 » by **TheDon008** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 9:12 pm

BadMofoPimp wrote:Miami sucks because I keep getting beat up by Latino guys for having sex with their Latino women.

truthiness · Post #14 » by **truthiness** » Tue Jun 7, 2011 9:56 pm

Dwayne Moss wrote:
BadMofoPimp wrote:Miami sucks because I keep getting beat up by Latino guys for having sex with their Latino women.

+

On a semi-related note I was thinking about "why the Miami Heat sucks".

Something like:

"Miami sucks because it's a small market and Lebron will never want to play in a small market and share the spotlight with Dwyane Wade. He's more interested in money than winning, so he'll come play for the Knicks."

or

"Miami sucks because they only have one title that the refs gave them, and Wade wants to play for his hometown because the Bulls have 6 championships and because Rose is better than Beasley. So Miami will be left without Lebron and without Wade and will suck even more"

I don't know much about the city of Miami, but I do remember what fans of 29 other teams were talking before Riley shut their mouthes up. And after 1 year of them doing a 180 and complaining how Miami was too loaded and how unfair it was, I think now it's a good time to remember those quotes.

Axel · Post #15 » by **Axel** » Wed Jun 8, 2011 5:16 am

truthiness wrote:I want you to tell me why Miami sucks.

And in order to support NBA's green initiative, everything in this thread should be considered to be in green font (just in case there were any doubts).

I will start:

The Heat sucks because it's ruining the league, because there will be no more parity. Now you will start seeing these stacked teams. It's so bad it's not only affecting the future of the league, but its past, too. I mean look at all the teams the Heat helped create:

- Bill Russell's Celtics with 7 HOFers on the team
- 3 top 50 all time players on the Lakers: West, Elgin Baylor, Wilt Chamberlain + HOFer Gail Goodrich
- 3 top 50 all time players on the Lakers (AGAIN): Magic, Kareem, Worthy
- 2 top 50 all time players on the Celtics: Bird, McHale + 2 HOFers: Dennis Johnson, Robert Parish
- 3 top 50 all time players on the Celtics: Bird, McHale, Walton + 2 HOFers: Dennis Johnson, Robert Parish
- 2 top 50 all time players on the Bulls: Jordan, Pippen + HOFer and best rebounder ever Rodman
- 1 top 50 all time player on Detroit: Isiah + 2 HOFers: Dumars and Rodman
- 2 top 50 all time players on the Sixers: Moses Malone and Dr J
- 2 top 50 all time players on the Spurs: David Robinson and Tim Duncan
- 2 top 50 all time players on the Rockets: Hakeem and Drexler

Not to mention all the teams that the Heat helped create but failed to win, like:

- 3 top 50 all time players on the Rockets: Hakeem, Barkley and Pippen

The Heat even made Barkley want to team up with other good players to look for a ring. I know, disgusting.

Because of the Heat small market teams won't be able to get FA anymore. That's because players will want to replicate what Lebron and Wade did: they refused small market teams like NY and Chicago to go play in the biggest market on the planet - no, in the galaxy - Miami.

That's another one of those things that affect the past.
This is why Miami is to blame for Shaq leaving Orlando and going to LA.
Also, as Bulls fans know too well, it's Miami's fault no big name FA wanted to play for their small market team in 2000 and they chose big markets like San Antonio and Orlando.

Troll!!!! How dare you bait us like that! We would never insinuate such things!