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Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 3:57 am
by infernoskull
I propose we trade bosh and calderon and bargs, basically whatever it takes to get Earl Boykins and Shaq on our team.
Now hear me out, this sounds like a joke, but i am freaking serious as hell right now.
If we had Shaq and boykins on our team we could literally be unstoppable on offence... defence would have to be played with the rest of the 5 guys on the floor, but on offence, it would just run through 2 guys.
The gameplan:
Play A: Give boykins the ball, have shaq pick boykins up, have shaq walk to the basket, have boykins dunk it in. Its not a travel, because boykins doesnt touch the ground, and since shaq doesnt have the ball in his hands, he cant be called for the travel either. Literally shaq could run down full court with boykins in his arms and as long as shaq doesnt charge into any defenders, the play would be legal.
Play B: Give boykins the ball, have shaq literally throw boykins from the three point line, over defenders and in for the dunk.. now this play has its flaws, obviously, the main one being boykins would most likely get injured on the landing, but this is for end of game situations or emergencies, and we would use this sparingly.
The gameplan is that simple folks and its unstoppable, even smitch could coach this offence. Its certainly doable from an assets point of view, as i think we have enough pieces to get shaq and boykins on our team.
Anyone else have any play ideas that would work with the boykins shaq offence?

Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:00 am
by snapcracklepape
This is the funniest thing I've heard in a while.
Get Er' Done!!!
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:00 am
by random_hero891
why waste the money on these Big named players when all we need is a giant sized man and a child, I would say Michael Olowokandi and any small child would do the trick.
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:02 am
by kcthekid
IBTL
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:02 am
by LethalJay
Get er done BC!
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:03 am
by God's Point
Haha... I was ready to flame... but you got me to laugh so props!
Oh that BC weed and the wonders it does.
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:06 am
by infernoskull
random_hero891 wrote:why waste the money on these Big named players when all we need is a giant sized man and a child, I would say Michael Olowokandi and any small child would do the trick.
ive thought this through in my head for the last 3 days, and i initially thought of that scenario you posted, but you gotta remember, we need to have someone to play defence, and shaq and boykins can actually play defence.
this plan only works if you dont let your opponent score every time down the floor.
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:12 am
by DG88
Wow just simply wow man i applaud you for you're great thinking
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:14 am
by TheRaptor!
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:16 am
by Geddy
That was a good read! I like your thinking.
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:16 am
by Tomato
Hahaha our board has gone insane.
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:22 am
by infernoskull
Oh and for any of you naysayers who think that there might be a tecnicality that actually makes Plan A: a travel, think about this scenario that happens all the time in the nba
A post player is backing down another player, the defensive player has his forearm on the post players back, now watch, that defensive player takes lots of steps, more than three usually, and usually those steps happen when the offensive player isn't even dribbling it, so this is proof that you can be touching a player who has the ball and take as many steps as you want, as long as youre not touching the ball itself.
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:35 am
by booyah_child
I like it! Sign me up!
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:38 am
by 5DOM
or we could just sign rory delap to throw alleyoop passes every inbounding play.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvTS2wmnt3A
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 5:12 am
by nizaam
down like a clown charlie brown
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 5:26 am
by Spicy P
Have Shaq stand just inside the three point line with the ball with his back facing the basket. Have Boykins run around, getting the defender to chase him and then get him to run through Shaq's legs to behind the three point line. The defender will then have to go around Shaq to get to Boykins. Shaq tosses the ball to Boykins. Wide open three.
It might work better if Shaq held out the ball for Boykins to grab when he's going through his legs.
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 5:27 am
by qwikdraw
hilarious i actually laughed out loud
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 5:31 am
by TorontoBaller
Hilarious!
My fav is... "now this play has its flaws, obviously, the main one being boykins would most likely get injured on the landing"
But the ingenuity to come up with a gem like this... fackin great!
Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 5:39 am
by RiceItUp
Of course your method is bound to fail when Duncan and Garnett are camping around the paint area. In this case, Duncan can lift up KG or visa versa, so Boykins cant dunk on hoop anymore

Re: Guaranteed Championship: The Shaq / Boykins offence
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 5:39 am
by Raptor_Jesus
the first legit funny thread i've read on this board.