Condi Rice wrote:Everyone knows Bargnani and Bosh can't co-exist, Bargnani definately knows it, two jump shooting PF's don't make a Dwight. So who will be the "One"? I think it is becoming more apparant to the trained eye (in the art of Michael Moore not to be confused with Mikki Moore) that Il Mago is trying to rid himself of his Multiverse Counterpart aka Boshelicious, aka the RuPaul of "big men". So how is he doing it?
But first an interlude, Into the past of our two star-crossed ballers we go! Like a castrating asian housewife, Bosh has been ordering Bargnani around since he was a rookie, yelling at him in team huddles, humiliating him in front of his teammates, fans and lest we forget Mop Girl. But of course Andrea does not forget, nor forgive. After Andrea got his big contract, which was by no means in anyway a face saving move by BC, you would think he would get some respect from Bosh. But NO, Bosh is still beating on him like he's a flaccid appendage. Ordering him to grow a spine, stiffen up play D, rebound, oh the hypocrisy! Ridiculing the team's interior D, a not so subtle slap in the face of our beloved Italian Necromancer, aka Il Mago.
Bargnani has had enough. Bargnani plots his revenge with a calculus so chilling that those sultry creatures of the tropical islands in heat would find themselves all at once chaste. The means are quite simple actually, but diabolical nonetheless, and of course wholly expected from our evil genius necromancer. Bosh orders more D? Bargnani simply makes a half-hearted attempt at helping on Jose "El Matador" Calderon's man, leaving himself guarding no one. Bosh orders more rebounding? Bargnani simply boxes out one of his teammates. There is simply nothing to lose for Bargnani, and only so much to gain. The contract is in hand, nothing to worry about there. A losing season will guarantee Bosh's demise as a Raptor, and that is exactly what our evil genious necromancer is conjuring.
Two men enter, one man leaves.
Lolz, thanks for this, I had fun reading it
This is clearly what Bargani's plotting behind the scenes, and we all know now that he is in fact an evil genius necromancer. it all makes perfect sense really.