It's all so tiresome.
Most recent book I've been reading has an interesting definition of privilege -
The opportunity to walk away.
I'm not suggesting someone who finds this tiresome should walk away but
rather think about this anecdote -
the book's author was invited to participate in an intentionally multi cultural but
small group of pastors/ministers to meet monthly for a year. The White pastor
who initiated this had become restless over the state of racial affairs in
their city (Chicago) and felt that clergy should lead the effort to demonstrate
unity across racial lines.
For the first 2 meetings the leader brought an agenda for discussion
describing issues he thought the group could address. His agenda focused
on church leadership and theology. In each of the first 2 meetings
the discussion had shifted away from those topics to issues of racial justice
such as violence and poverty. At the beginning of the 3rd meeting the leader
confessed an uncertainty as to how he should participate as he had thought
the topics of church leadership and theology should be discussed but were
being eclipsed by racial justice issues.
At outset of the third meeting the leader made the honest confession
that he felt energized when he had had discussions with other pastors
about church leadership and theology but felt drained and completely
tired after discussions on race. His comments hung in the air for a seemingly
long time until a black pastor responded in what the author described as
a perfect combination of truth and love.
The Black pastor said "If you think you're tired, imagine how I feel. You're
talking about this once a month for two hours and then you get to go back into environments
where you can stop thinking about these issues. I don't ever get the opportunity
to turn this conversation off. The livelihood of my family depends on these issues.
The livelihood of my congregation depends on these issues. I don't have the luxury
to pick and choose when I talk about this. If the Christian faith doesn't speak to these
issues in my community, then that faith would be irrelevant."
When the White pastor responded, he admitted that he'd never considered how
privileged he was to be able to come in and out of these conversations without
any real cost and acknowledged that 'tired' for him couldn't really compare to
the fatigue of talking about issues of race on a daily or even hourly basis.
This story was placed in a chapter on disorientation, a consequence of going
from blindness to sight.