Post#625 » by KnicksGadfly » Tue Jan 28, 2020 1:03 am
Something I wrote after Kobe passed:
I didn’t like Kobe.
The problem was, I couldn’t get away from him. He would come to the Garden and dominate us, to the disgusting and traitorous (and let's face it, understandable) cheers of the Madison Square Garden faithful, and set records. On the PS2, my brother would lock in the Lakers, grab Kobe and take him to that sweet midrange spot…swish over and over again, on my stubborn Knicks-playing butt (all I had was Stephon). And anytime I’d go on the courts in China and see someone dribbling a ton and then taking a contested fadeaway against 2 opponents…I’d think, screw you Kobe. Screw you for even ruining all my pickup games. And that one guy who would always ruin my fantasy basketball league by trading all his top picks for Kobe.
But soon, that jealousy and anger turned to begrudging appreciation. Yea, I was hoping the Knicks would trade for him once he made that trade request (of course, it never happened, like it never does for us). The Matt Barnes thing…that was sick. And him shooting free throws with the torn Achilles. And him beating the Jazz during his last game by taking 50 shots. And yea, on the court at college, sometimes I’d pretend to be Kobe and jut out my jaw to annoy my friends and make them laugh (even though I played more like an injured Karl Malone). But even that was an acknowledgement of Kobe.
A while back, Michael Jackson passed away---I won't lie, I didn't get it all. But now I do. I have a kid now, and it feels weird, wrong that he won't grow up in a world with Kobe Bryant, that he'll only hear these random stories from me, watch these youtube videos. Kobe wasn’t perfect, and I'll tell him about that too...all the things. He was more than a basketball player, and I appreciate how people share that too.
But for now, I think the main thing I’m thinking now is that now Kobe’s not here anymore. It feels wrong, and it feels so meaningless. It feels like I took him for granted, that he would be here forever, the guy who would destroy my Knicks over and over again, the guy I wanted every player to emulate. The guy who went through so much pain to reach his goals is gone, and it feels like for no reason. No celebration, no Hall of Fame entrance yet, so much more to achieve. And it hurts.
Rest in Peace.
