Are the Pelicans the worst franchise ever?
Posted: Tue Jan 21, 2025 6:46 pm
The New Orleans Pelicans, a Pelican as the mascot of a sports team. Before even talking about the basketball stuff, I want to give the name a moment of recognition. It is really the worst name of all the teams in the NBA.
The name doesn't exactly roll off the tongue. The worst part about the team name is the difficulty when it comes to shortening it with a nick name. I mean "Pels" or "Pellies" doesn't exactly come across as interesting or intimidating. You can't really call them the "'Cans" or the "Icans" Saying the full "Pelican" is too much. It's a 3 syllable word, generally sports team want to be 1-2 syllables to make them easy to say. Pelicans don't exactly ignite fear. It isn't something rolls off the tongue easy as an apex predator like the "Hawks". Look at other bird teams in sports, they're really iconic birds. "Falcons", "Eagles", "Cardinals". Even the "Seahawks" sounds much more intimidating than a "Pelican" I mean of all the bird name sports teams the Pelicans is the worst one, right? I can't think of a single one worse.
Ok, now onto the history of this storied franchise. First of all, I don't think anyone in New Orleans cares about them. Legitimately I was in New Orleans November of last year and every single sign was "THIS IS SAINTS COUNTRY" with immense love for the New Orleans Saints, and how can you not appreciate such an awesome franchise with the iconic Gold and Black, "WHO DAT" "Oh when the Saints..." and of course Drew Brees.
Now the Pelicans kind of just exist. In terms of franchise greats, Anthony Davis is the franchise's greatest player of all time. Now That would be cool and all except for the fact that Anthony Davis literally played NONE of his prime there. I mean seriously, he was 26 when he was traded, he was barely in his prime. I mean sure he has more All Stars and All NBA selections in a New Orleans uniform, but it doesn't really change that the lesser Anthony Davis is their best player of all time and they almost never made the playoffs or contended with him.
Oh and then they had Chris Paul too, who also had some awesome years and actually put out some respectable basketball teams during his time there. Never made a conference finals, but hey CP3 made his name known in a New Orleans..uhhhh Hornets uniform. Yeah no one even thinks about CP3 as a Pelican, they know him as a Hornet. Confusing, isn't it? Much like Anthony Davis, CP3 turned 25 and said "get me the **** out of here"
So yeah, basically the two best New Orleans franchise Basketball players of all time barely made to to the age of 25 before saying "Get me out of here"
This franchise is so awful that Zion Williamson has played 194 career games and is actually 6th all time in their franchise scoring. Oh, by the way, Zion turns 25 soon which is so fitting because now is exactly when he's starting to throw tantrums and ask out. What is it about the age of 25 that makes a basketball player want to get out of NoLA?
But yeah, this team sucks, I mean it's hard to really see what the draw is for this team. The name sucks, the city is, truly, kind of dirty and grimy if you've ever been. The fandom is non-existent, the history isn't there, you're not exactly getting models. Sure the food is "good" (overrated if you ask me). So they've bombed out of another era of what was supposed to be a "change" for the future. Every year cursed by injuries despite looking like a really good team by mid October. The coach, Willie Green, is actually kind of awesome and David Griffin is an underrated GM in some ways who's managed to get good returns for the amazing assets this god awful franchise pulls.
Now of course we have to look at the other "historically awful" franchises and compare. Well the go to would be the Wizards, but I'd rather be the Wizards than the Pelicans. For starters, the Wizards actually have legitimate fans. People who loved the Gilbert Arenas era, the John Wall era, and these eras actually fulfilled their potential. Sure the potential wasn't exactly super high, but they did produce memorable teams. Oh and Elvin Hayes would literally lead NoLa in almost every major stat if he played his career out there. Plus the Wizards actually have an MVP, his name is Wes Unseld! Oh and multiple finals appearances with a ring! There was at one point in time a monstrous Wizards team. The market is better too, play in the same arena as an elite NHL team which helps.
Then there's the Hornets, well the Hornets do suck, they kind of share history with NoLA who at one point held to the title of "Hornets". I'd still rather be the Hornets though, the market is also better, NC is a classic basketball state, you have Duke and UNC carrying legacies. The 90s Hornets were actually an iconic team. NoLA has never had an "era" like a meaningful "era". So because of that and the fact that today they have good opportunity for the future with Miller and LaMelo, plus I think their stars actually want to be there. The jerseys and colors are AWESOME. There's a lot of like about being a player there. Even a guy like Steph Curry said he would only play there.
Then the other classic throw-ins like the Kings, TWolves, Clippers, well these teams have turned leafs around or have had enough iconic eras and players that they have legitimate fandoms today.
So yes, the Pelicans might be the worst franchise in the NBA and it really sucks.
The name doesn't exactly roll off the tongue. The worst part about the team name is the difficulty when it comes to shortening it with a nick name. I mean "Pels" or "Pellies" doesn't exactly come across as interesting or intimidating. You can't really call them the "'Cans" or the "Icans" Saying the full "Pelican" is too much. It's a 3 syllable word, generally sports team want to be 1-2 syllables to make them easy to say. Pelicans don't exactly ignite fear. It isn't something rolls off the tongue easy as an apex predator like the "Hawks". Look at other bird teams in sports, they're really iconic birds. "Falcons", "Eagles", "Cardinals". Even the "Seahawks" sounds much more intimidating than a "Pelican" I mean of all the bird name sports teams the Pelicans is the worst one, right? I can't think of a single one worse.
Ok, now onto the history of this storied franchise. First of all, I don't think anyone in New Orleans cares about them. Legitimately I was in New Orleans November of last year and every single sign was "THIS IS SAINTS COUNTRY" with immense love for the New Orleans Saints, and how can you not appreciate such an awesome franchise with the iconic Gold and Black, "WHO DAT" "Oh when the Saints..." and of course Drew Brees.
Now the Pelicans kind of just exist. In terms of franchise greats, Anthony Davis is the franchise's greatest player of all time. Now That would be cool and all except for the fact that Anthony Davis literally played NONE of his prime there. I mean seriously, he was 26 when he was traded, he was barely in his prime. I mean sure he has more All Stars and All NBA selections in a New Orleans uniform, but it doesn't really change that the lesser Anthony Davis is their best player of all time and they almost never made the playoffs or contended with him.
Oh and then they had Chris Paul too, who also had some awesome years and actually put out some respectable basketball teams during his time there. Never made a conference finals, but hey CP3 made his name known in a New Orleans..uhhhh Hornets uniform. Yeah no one even thinks about CP3 as a Pelican, they know him as a Hornet. Confusing, isn't it? Much like Anthony Davis, CP3 turned 25 and said "get me the **** out of here"
So yeah, basically the two best New Orleans franchise Basketball players of all time barely made to to the age of 25 before saying "Get me out of here"
This franchise is so awful that Zion Williamson has played 194 career games and is actually 6th all time in their franchise scoring. Oh, by the way, Zion turns 25 soon which is so fitting because now is exactly when he's starting to throw tantrums and ask out. What is it about the age of 25 that makes a basketball player want to get out of NoLA?
But yeah, this team sucks, I mean it's hard to really see what the draw is for this team. The name sucks, the city is, truly, kind of dirty and grimy if you've ever been. The fandom is non-existent, the history isn't there, you're not exactly getting models. Sure the food is "good" (overrated if you ask me). So they've bombed out of another era of what was supposed to be a "change" for the future. Every year cursed by injuries despite looking like a really good team by mid October. The coach, Willie Green, is actually kind of awesome and David Griffin is an underrated GM in some ways who's managed to get good returns for the amazing assets this god awful franchise pulls.
Now of course we have to look at the other "historically awful" franchises and compare. Well the go to would be the Wizards, but I'd rather be the Wizards than the Pelicans. For starters, the Wizards actually have legitimate fans. People who loved the Gilbert Arenas era, the John Wall era, and these eras actually fulfilled their potential. Sure the potential wasn't exactly super high, but they did produce memorable teams. Oh and Elvin Hayes would literally lead NoLa in almost every major stat if he played his career out there. Plus the Wizards actually have an MVP, his name is Wes Unseld! Oh and multiple finals appearances with a ring! There was at one point in time a monstrous Wizards team. The market is better too, play in the same arena as an elite NHL team which helps.
Then there's the Hornets, well the Hornets do suck, they kind of share history with NoLA who at one point held to the title of "Hornets". I'd still rather be the Hornets though, the market is also better, NC is a classic basketball state, you have Duke and UNC carrying legacies. The 90s Hornets were actually an iconic team. NoLA has never had an "era" like a meaningful "era". So because of that and the fact that today they have good opportunity for the future with Miller and LaMelo, plus I think their stars actually want to be there. The jerseys and colors are AWESOME. There's a lot of like about being a player there. Even a guy like Steph Curry said he would only play there.
Then the other classic throw-ins like the Kings, TWolves, Clippers, well these teams have turned leafs around or have had enough iconic eras and players that they have legitimate fandoms today.
So yes, the Pelicans might be the worst franchise in the NBA and it really sucks.
