Jays sign Lance Broadway!

Post #1 » by **Schad** » Wed Dec 16, 2009 4:31 pm

http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2009/12/b ... adway.html

The silliest name in baseball is coming our way! There's only five months 'til the season...start preparing your jokes, people!

SharoneWright · Post #2 » by **SharoneWright** » Wed Dec 16, 2009 4:49 pm

Schadenfreude wrote:http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2009/12/blue-jays-sign-lance-broadway.html

...start preparing your jokes, people!

5.87 ERA
Lance "Right Down" Broadway?

s e n s i · Post #3 » by **s e n s i** » Wed Dec 16, 2009 4:54 pm

FTR, I finally got around to seeing his flick Schad recommended earlier in the year, Lance Broadway Gets Lanced on Broadway, starring Lance Broadway and co-starring rkid's favourite athlete-actor of all time, Josh Outman. T'was a dandy.

And now I have the chance to see him in person every time I attend a game! Totally makes up for the cellar-dwelling aspirations of the 2010 Jays.

Post #4 » by **Schad** » Wed Dec 16, 2009 5:50 pm

And I hear that he and John Buck are putting out a series together: Lance Broadway Presents: Battery Mates. The announced titles thus far are On the Rubber and Pleasuring the (Sky)dome. Should be good stuff.

s e n s i · Post #5 » by **s e n s i** » Wed Dec 16, 2009 10:38 pm

So I've heard. There's also one titled Pitching or Catching: It Doesn't Matter. Intriguing, to say the least.

Post #6 » by **Schad** » Wed Dec 16, 2009 11:38 pm

I can't believe I missed something as obvious as the pitcher/catcher thing. Consider this my letter of resignation from making Lance Broadway jokes.

Post #7 » by **Geddy** » Thu Dec 17, 2009 2:37 am

This is great news. I feel like singing some show tunes!

Schadenfreude wrote:And I hear that he and John Buck are putting out a series together: Lance Broadway Presents: Battery Mates. The announced titles thus far are On the Rubber and Pleasuring the (Sky)dome. Should be good stuff.

chocolateSensi wrote:So I've heard. There's also one titled Pitching or Catching: It Doesn't Matter. Intriguing, to say the least.

i'm gonna pee myself :lol:

zilby · Post #8 » by **zilby** » Thu Dec 17, 2009 2:55 am

jalenrose#5 · Post #9 » by **jalenrose#5** » Thu Dec 17, 2009 5:16 am

I'll chime in with a battery joke...

Two Fingers Or One?
Starring Johnny "Buck" Naked and Lance "Bass" Broadway

Field of Wet Dreams
Starring Johnny "Buck" Naked and Lance "Bass" Broadway, guest starring Pantless Joe Jackson

Stealing Sloppy Seconds
Starring Johnny "Buck" Naked and Lance "Bass" Broadway, guest starring BJ Uptown

"Sliding into Home with No Glove On"
Starring John "Buck" Naked

rtcaino · Post #10 » by **rtcaino** » Thu Dec 17, 2009 5:22 am

I think it is smart to try anyone with good stuff who has not been tried much as a reliever.

s e n s i · Post #11 » by **s e n s i** » Thu Dec 17, 2009 5:38 am

jalenrose#5 wrote:I'll chime in with a battery joke...

Two Fingers Or One?
Starring Johnny "Buck" Naked and Lance "Bass" Broadway

Field of Wet Dreams
Starring Johnny "Buck" Naked and Lance "Bass" Broadway, guest starring Pantless Joe Jackson

Stealing Sloppy Seconds
Starring Johnny "Buck" Naked and Lance "Bass" Broadway, guest starring BJ Uptown

"Sliding into Home with No Glove On"
Starring John "Buck" Naked

Broadway has quite an extensive filmography. Don't forget to rent past titles like:

Right Down The Pipe
Knee Pads Etcetera
That Ain't Eye-Black (Coincidentally, Rod Black makes a cameo appearance)

and my personal favourite,

Third Base Just Isn't Enough

jalenrose#5 · Post #12 » by **jalenrose#5** » Thu Dec 17, 2009 9:27 pm

question is chocolateSensi...did he bring back the porn stasche in That Aint Eye- Black.

Don't forget his early film....

Smooth or Rough: Vaseline vs. Sand Paper

Starring Lance "Right Down the Pipe" Broadway...special guest appearance by none other than Gaylord Perry. Name pretty much says it all!!!

Post #13 » by **Schad** » Thu Dec 17, 2009 9:45 pm

jalenrose#5 wrote:question is chocolateSensi...did he bring back the porn stasche in That Aint Eye- Black.

Don't forget his early film....

Smooth or Rough: Vaseline vs. Sand Paper

Starring Lance "Right Down the Pipe" Broadway...special guest appearance by none other than Gaylord Perry. Name pretty much says it all!!!

Simply titled Spitballs when it was released internationally, I believe.

jalenrose#5 · Post #14 » by **jalenrose#5** » Thu Dec 17, 2009 10:08 pm

lmao...wow, if Broadway sticks with the Jays, this year will not be pretty, but he'll be the butt-end of many, many jokes. This is great stuff.

Post #15 » by **Schad** » Thu Dec 17, 2009 10:16 pm

jalenrose#5 wrote:lmao...wow, if Broadway sticks with the Jays, this year will not be pretty, but he'll be the butt-end of many, many jokes. This is great stuff.

His butt-end is no joke.

s e n s i · Post #16 » by **s e n s i** » Fri Dec 18, 2009 6:12 am

Someone has to get it, especially with Lyle likely on the way out. What better player to fill the void than this man.

s e n s i · Post #17 » by **s e n s i** » Fri Dec 18, 2009 6:18 am

jalenrose#5 wrote:question is chocolateSensi...did he bring back the porn stasche in That Aint Eye- Black.

You mean the porn stache he sported in Rod Black/Black Rod: Featuring Marcus Thames? If so, then yeah, he's got it- except it wasn't as tantalizing.