Bill Simmons "Suggestions" For the Bobcats

[Mezotarkus]

Bill Simmons may need an intervention because he's writing as if he is on drugs. The two trades he suggests below are nuts. The first one is way too favorable to the Bobcats and the second is way too unfavorable to the Bobcats.

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/st ... ortCat=nba

Charlotte Bobcats (group A)

2009-10 payroll: $67.0 million
Projected 2010-11 payroll: $59.8 million

• VP's Take: I don't mind watching these guys. They play hard, they're well-coached and Gerald Wallace's rebounding binge ranks up there with Kevin Porter being a four-time assist leader and E.C. Coleman making first-team All-Defense as one of the most random NBA things that's ever happened. If they upgraded Boris Diaw ($27 million through 2012), they might even be a mildly frisky Round 1 opponent. On the flip side, they're leading the league in Monets and paying $50.5 million combined through 2011 to Tyson Chandler, DeSagana Diop and Nazr Mohammed … or as they're more commonly known, "50.5 Million That We Should Have Just Set On Fire."

(Important note: Did you know DeSagana Diop will earn $7.342 million just for the 2012-13 season? I think the Mark Cuban Big Man Scholarship Fund is my favorite NBA charity. The NBA really DOES care.)

• Mitigating Factor: Larry Brown is permanently wired in "short-term right now we gotta fix this and get better!" mode, only they're getting destroyed financially and can only hope to win 37 to 40 games (good enough to make the playoffs in the crappy Eastern Conference, but still).

• VP's Verdict: Go for it this year and tank long-term. For example …

Fake Trade 4a: Diaw, D.J. Augustin and Gerald Henderson to Phoenix for Amar'e Stoudemire and Taylor Griffin (cap throw-in). Charlotte satiates Brown's short-term competitive disorder, gets a 20-point scorer AND gets out of Diaw's deal. If Amar'e leaves after the season, so be it. Phoenix saves $6 million (including the tax), adds two young assets and gets something for Amar'e. One danger: Nash pulls a "BROOKS WAS HERE" in his hotel room when he hears about the trade. Otherwise, I like it.

Fake Trade 4b: Chandler and Wallace to the Clippers for Marcus Camby, Al Thornton and the Rasual Butler/Ricky Davis ECs. Camby is a one-year upgrade on Chandler who replaces Wallace's rebounding; Thornton/Butler could replace Wallace's scoring; and the deal saves Charlotte $3 million-plus this year, then another $20 million next year. Again, have you seen their home games? They hosted Detroit on Tuesday and it looked like it was "Get Your Own Row Night."

[Walt Cronkite]

I give Simmons credit for writing about the NBA when no one cared. His draft diaries, mailbags and offseason rankings gave me a fun to read/knowledgeable NBA fan when I was stuck surrounded by people that only cared about college basketball. Two things happened.

1. He became too big. This is not his fault, but he has his own section of ESPN and the over saturation has made him totally unbearable.

2. The joke franchises that he wrote about became good. He was endearing when he was a guy that cared about the NBA, who just so happened to follow a traditional powerhouse stuck in mismanagement. Having a crapper to follow meant that he had to look to the league as a whole and he had an accurate perspective on player value, so his trade columns were pretty good.

As the Celtics have improved, Simmons has lost that perspective. As his empire has grown, he's lost the time and motivation he used to have that made him what he was. In short, I've gone from being a loyal reader that checked for his newest column and read it regardless if I cared about the sport he was writing about or not (baseball/hockey) because he had at least entertainment value, to someone that has found him unreadable for years now.

[fatlever]

interesting first trade...

second trade would see all remaining bobcats fans lose their collective minds. i'm almost ready to reinstate the "we do not want to trade wallace" sticky from a few years ago.

[fatlever]

has anyone read his book? is it worth reading?

on an unrelated side-note - i recently starting reading rick bonnell's book about the 1993 charlotte hornets. it seems good so far.

[99problems]

I don't think the trades are that far off. I think the first one works well. I wouldn't want to trade Wallace either, but if it's about saving money.....

[Diop]

interesting first trade...

second trade would see all remaining bobcats fans lose their collective minds. i'm almost ready to reinstate the "we do not want to trade wallace" sticky from a few years ago.

I'm with you on this one Fats, now that Wallace is playing like an all star there have been some terrible trade suggestions for him.

[Bassman]

Would likely do the 1st trade, although it would could be a "blow it up" scenario since Amare would either not sign here or cost so many $ next year (for diminishing performance levels) that it wouldn't be worth it. The 2nd is officially a blow it up trade...it would blow EVERYTHING up. The Wallace trade scenarios are likely to increase over time. But we do NOT deal Wallace for anything short of a crazy good deal. When do we ever get one of those?

[Mezotarkus]

On a completely unrelated topic, this may be the funniest thing in the history of the internet:

http://www.lolfbmoments.com/?m=200912&paged=29

[fatlever]

thanks mezo... i have been reading that site for the past hour.

[fatlever]

another hour wasted on that link. i cant stop laughing. GOLD. mezo, you gave me the best xmas present ever. top that santa.

[Mezotarkus]

Heh, thanks. That site is comedic gold. I could hardly breathe at the end of the link and spent at least two hours last night on that site. That site is now without a doubt part of my daily website rotation!

[Rich4114]

hahah, i must also thank you for this site Mez

[Bizz]

I found lamebook.com a few days back and spent a whole day searching it. It's pretty much the same stuff. Anyways LOL

[SportsFan215]

Would the Bobcats be interested in a Baron Davis for Felton/Nazr swap?

[fatlever]

i think baron would be a miserable bitch if he got traded to charlotte. he bitched the first time he was here and that was a long time ago before he feel in love with his LA movie crap. i wouldnt want to deal with an unmotivated baron.

[amcoolio]

Baron has publicly stated he cares more about LA than about basketball. Ever since he was drafted by the Hornets his main goal has been to get back to LA. Thats why he took the Clippers over the Warriors, because Oakland ain't quite LA. Baron is just in it for the money and celeb status.

[raferfenix]

So if the Bobcats have to make a cost cutting move, what kind of deal do you think they would/could make?

I know how much this board loves Gerald Wallace, and I agree with you that there is a lot of reason to think his value could be extremely high if the right team/s are gunning for him. Then again...how likely is it that things are so dire that you are forced to dump him?

Other players could presumably be dumped in a cap move as well---Chandler probably the most likely I'm thinking.

So if that is the case, what kind of deal would you expect?

[BigSlam]

So if the Bobcats have to make a cost cutting move, what kind of deal do you think they would/could make?

I know how much this board loves Gerald Wallace, and I agree with you that there is a lot of reason to think his value could be extremely high if the right team/s are gunning for him. Then again...how likely is it that things are so dire that you are forced to dump him?

Other players could presumably be dumped in a cap move as well---Chandler probably the most likely I'm thinking.

So if that is the case, what kind of deal would you expect?

It's more about what kind of a deal you would offer rather than what we would expect - because we aren't looking to move him.

Tell us what you have in mind and we'll tell you if you are close to the mark or not.

It would have to be VERY tempting though because trading away Crash wouldn't be a salary dump type move.

[Battery]

So if the Bobcats have to make a cost cutting move, what kind of deal do you think they would/could make?

I know how much this board loves Gerald Wallace, and I agree with you that there is a lot of reason to think his value could be extremely high if the right team/s are gunning for him. Then again...how likely is it that things are so dire that you are forced to dump him?

Other players could presumably be dumped in a cap move as well---Chandler probably the most likely I'm thinking.

So if that is the case, what kind of deal would you expect?

We expect no deal because we're not making cost cutting moves right now. Hello??

[Rich4114]

If I didn't care about winning at all and just wanted to cut salary I would do the following:

Wallace or Jackson or Diaw and Diop for Boozer
Jackson or Wallace or Diaw for McGrady

plus whatever fill-ins were needed.

This would put us in position to clear most of the big salary off our roster with the only big contract after this season being Chandlers (for one). This wouldn't go down too well though. Our best guaranteed returning player after this season would be DJ, lol.