dougthonus wrote:you just sealed his case....
men get married because that's what they feel is necessary to lock up something nice...women movement, future mother in laws, the government, and society in general have played key roles in furthering this general feeling thats what you need to do to keep them. "if you like then you shoulda put a ring on it." think about that song for a second. And if someone that looks like beyonce comes along in my life I will do everything in my power to keep her in girlfriend status but would marry her to keep her if she was also a good person and I loved her. I would role the dice. deep inside i am a gambler. But I would do so knowing full well that the set up is on. the sting is in and I'm th esucka. the second she finds something better or the newness wears off or anything, really...she could be gone. and If i decide to be gone it will cost half of everything and 20% per child per month.
Women typically come out of divorce FAR worse off than men, so to act like the man is the one who is "screwed" is sort of ridiculous. Maybe your wife/girlfriend whatever doesn't contribute anything to your relationship, but then pick a better partner.
How much do you think you should have to pay for your children? 20% too much? Should the mom bear all the expenses? The idea that you think paying for your kids is some type of scam is mind boggling. It's your responsibility once you have kids.
lol- you assume too much. 20% of $5000 per month is $1000 per month. I would call that enough to provide at least the minimal for a child. Not sure what welfare provides but based on various things I've heard through the years i am assuming $700-$800 per child per month as the entire amount food, education, everything included in that. In a divorce with children the father usually also provides education allowance and other resposiblities. The father also has the child under his care for 3 of the 7 days per week. In this scenario $1000 per child is suppose to provide half of the money to raise the child. If I had kids I would gladly pay that amount per month. BUT 20% of 60,000 per month is is $12000 per month. no friggin way are you going to convince me it cost that much to raise a child...and many men earn more than $60,000 per month. In this case we are talking professional athletes and tony parker makes about 1 million per month. Should he be paying $200,000 per month in child support if he had kids? Really? I think $12000 per month is obscene. oh? and she gets to keep the house too?
What you would be doing is paying about $1000-$2000 per month for you child's basic essentials for 4 days per week. the other 3 days per week you would be providing the childs essentials in your house(i should say your new house or apt because she is keeping the old one). the remaining $6000 would go to the baby's mama lifestyle and her new hot stud of the month to go have a good time. you assume way too much... and come off rather childish in oder to defend the married folk or something. I said there is nothing wrong with getting married at all. if its your time? its your time. I was married and would do it again. But I know what i am getting into. For guys like me its a sting...I am assuming you dont have that problem. But plenty of guys do. Some guys make $30,000 per year and there wife make $50,000 per year. its not a sting operation for him. Its a slam dunk. If she is hot and fun and nice to you along the way and doesn't make you do the dishes too often thats a sting operation for her since she is the one paying the mortgage. Good for him in that case. but men usually earn more.
As i said My ex and I are divorced. We didnt't even hire lawyers so this isnt bitterness. just the facts. She was a class act from the start and i told her to take what she felt was appropriate. She asked for nothing. I had to insist on many things. we are still friends because of how we both dealt with that. I am in a great realationship right now as well. I pay the bills and she does everything I ask and I mean everything. I sit on my arse and get served all day and all night long and would not have it any other way. My girlfriend is not a slave by any means. She goes for spa treatment and messages weekly on my dime and the maid come once per week to clean the house. Some guys dont mind or even like doing dishes. I'm not one of them. Neither way is right or wrong. But we are talking about athletes and Tony Parker is how this conversation got started.
And If I had children I can assure you they would go to the best schools in Illinois, and have the best nannies, private tutors, be involved in every single thing that exists that they desired and eventually drive the nicest cars and down the road I would buy them the nicest house I can afford and have the absolute best of everything and I would never be with a a woman who would not allow me to do that for my kids if we had them. I treat women extremely well, love them, cherish them, enjoy them. I just simply choose not to marry for as long as possible and if and or when i do i go into it knowing full well it is a sting operation from the beginning.
But I were divorced???????!!!! why on earth would I want to give her $12,000 or more per month???? especially when I am already going to do all that for my kids anyway? puhlease!!! If we divorce her lifestyle's tab is on the next sucka...not me! But my kids if I have them will be well taken care of and I would fight like heck to have custody in a situation like that.
I have a buddy though in a completely different situation. Him and his wife would not be able to live in the house he lives in or drive the cars they drive without his wife's additional income etc etc. That's not me. I'm old school. I've never gone dutch on a single date in my life...even when I was a broke snot-nosed punk 25 year old that thought he knew something. speaking of. Doesn't make my way right or wrong...but it is my way.
Along these lines fellas, if you are self employed, you set your own salary to which the courts decide the amounts of alimony and child support. And if you set up trusts or foundations prior to having children for your real estate and such she can never touch it. Ever. In fact, your trust can own your company and pay you meagerly

. In which case she would be better off just being nice and never hiring a lawyer cuz they wont be able to touch a thing save your meager salary. See, it aint exactly a sting operation once you know the name of the game and how to protect your assets. But most poeple dont know this nor can they set themselves up like this. and they get royally screwed over.
The whole system actually really stinks for the middle class. Middle class has the biggest tax burden, work the most hours, least amount of benefits, kids dont qualify for financial aid for college, at the most risk during child support/alimony court. When broke father gets divorced you think she even bothers to hire a lawyer and waste her money? Nope! She's happy if the father even sees the kid 2-3 times per week so she can go out and find herself something new to jump on. Rich guys do not go through this either. they know how to protect themselves or have laywers figure it out prior to. Nope, its the sorry sap, making 50,000-100,000 per year that loses his house he busted his butt for and loses his kids, watches another man raise his kids 4 days per week in the house he busted his butt to buy...that is until your exwife and her new boyfriend sell your old house and upgrade into the new one because her income just jumped $2000 on his child support payment. Oh...and because him andher both have "already been married" they dont "feel the need to do it again." So when the new guy moves on, he aint payin no child support and keeping half of the new house which was bought on the equity of your old house and the child support payments for your kids that he "raises."
its a frickin joke!!!!! But if you dont think so, you keep dreamin!
