The Cash Dollaz Front Man

Name: Frank Gores
Credentials: History of smart choices has made him a billionaire. Went to the finest University in the country.
Biggest Drawback: Bought his way into the brain trust.
The Zen Master

Name: Phil Jackson
Credentials: Winningest Head Coach Ever
Biggest Drawback: Hates Detroit and would love nothing more than to watch the Pistons suffer.
The Recently Cuckolded

Name: Joe Dumars
Credentials: Larrick Browlisle
Biggest Drawback: Johnchael Keurry
The Candidates
The Alleged Frontrunner

Name: Nate McMillan
Age: 48
Record: 478-452 (.514)
Also served as Assistant Coach to 2006 USA FIBA team (Bronze), 2008 & 2012 USA Olympic teams (Gold)
The One Shrouded in Mystery

Name: Zelijko Obradovic
Age: 53
2x Euroleague Coach of the Year (2007, 2011)
50 Greatest Euroleague Contributors member
8x Euroleague Champion
The Legend's Protoge: Part 1

Name: Brian Shaw
Age: 47
Assistant Coach on many successful Lakers and Pacers teams.
The Legend's Protoge: Part 2

Name: Mike Budenholzer
Age: 42
16 years as Spurs' assistant. Last 5 as top assistant.
Redeemed "Get One Free Interview" Coupon

Name: Lindsey Hunter
Age: 42
Record: 12-29 (.293)
Played 12 Seasons with the Pistons.
Along with Allan Houston, comprised the Pistons backcourt of the future (circa teal)
Both Is and Is Not a Candidate

Name: Kelvin Sampson
Age: 57
Only wears blue shirts when he coaches.
Specializes in improper phone contact with recruits.
Other Names Bandied About:

Name: Lionel Hollins
Age: 59
Record: 214-201 (.516)

Name: Maurice Cheeks
Age: 56
Record: 284-286 (.498)

Name: Bill Laimbeer
Age: 55
3x WNBA Champion