OT - My girl got fat

[AmazingJason]

I can only speak for myself, but from my experiences, being honest and transparent with your lover is the best way to go. Now, I for one don't date thicker girls, but have dated skinny girls who end up putting on weight with me. I'll cut straight to the chase and say, I'm very active and stay in shape myself. I try to involve them, and if they decline, so be it. But if it becomes a habitual thing and they keep avoiding it like the plague, that shows to me that they aren't likely to make the necessary adjustments for me. That's the first straw of selfishness. When this happens, I say it like it is and as blunt as possible. "Babe, hate to break it to you, but I'm worried about your weight. I fell for you initially because you're beautiful and grew to admire the human being you are. But I worry that this will affect our relationship. If you can't make the adjustments and try to improve your health, I worry about how our future will be if we were to potentially start a family. I'm sorry if you feel I'm shallow but that's the honest truth. Men are shallow, so are women, if you can't handle that, I don't think this is gonna work out."

The best girls (or men depending on your preference) are the ones that will do anything to satisfy your needs. You both are supposed to be a team here. You do things for her, and vice versa right? If it's a one way ticket, that ain't a healthy relationship to begin with. The ones that are willing to take honesty and make adjustments and sacrifices for you. If she's not willing to do that, bro, you're better off moving on. Yeah, you may love her to bits, but you won't be saying that years down the road while she continues to get fatter now are you? You're 31, there are so many women out there, and like you said, you go to the gym and there are sexy girls there. Give yourself some credit and be single again. It's not too late, it's not too difficult. But first things first, before totally giving up, talk to her about it openly. It WILL only help you both at the end of the day, and if she can't take the criticism and dedicate herself to slimming down, I think that says enough about the type of woman you're with. Do you really want that? Right, I didn't think so.

Can we give it a rest? 4 years ago, mang

[Greenie]

We can still have the discussion. I'm sure other posters have gone through it. I'm pretty sure the OP is still here.

[br7knicks]

well, i'm going to assume this is but i'll humor it.

why not help her workout. you probably aren't in perfect shape. if you love her (and each other), this should be a conversation, as long as you both handle it as adults. but you should be supportive and try to help her rather than pointing fingers.


that being said, if this is a joke, hopefully she's good at giving dome.

[Fat]

Bigger is better

[Greenie]

Bigger is better

[DaGawd]

Lol damn Greenie went way back

[br7knicks]

didn't realize how old this thread was. my bad

[ciregno]

Welp, just read this bit. The girl is in denial and her confidence is clearly hurt. If she can't handle the truth and doesn't do anything to make herself better so be it. Regardless, what you did was good for her to hear and good for you. It'll only light a fire under her ass. Whether she wants you back or not, you can at least say that you said the very thing you wanted to say to her and were honest about it. Time will tell if it works out, but otherwise, do ya thing bro. Best of luck to you.

Some things you just can't come back from. Doing it where he did was a problem. I doubt they got back together. Sucks because dude said he missed her later on in the thread.

Man that's a bummer. I didn't know it was THAT old of a thread. Agreed that doing it in bed is not the best setting for it, but at least it came out which is the most important thing. Wonder what he's been up to.

[NY2TheBay]

It was a bad night. We tried having sex and I just wasnt into it. So we laid there for a minute and she finally asks me whays wrong. I tried to avoid the issue but she asked me if theres another woman. I said no. She again asks whats wrong then. I realized lying would be futile so I came out and just said "baby, youre too big. Im sorry." She got quiet for a second then started crying....like a 2 year old! I tried to comfort her but she pushed me off and told me to leave. So I did. We talked on my way home and she starts going crazy, saying its not the weight, Im fking another chick, blah blah. So I just said youre in denial and.something needs to be done or else this wont last. She said ok yeah, Il do something, its over. So I just hung up and went to bed. Havent heard from her today. Dont care if I do.

Welp, just read this bit. The girl is in denial and her confidence is clearly hurt. If she can't handle the truth and doesn't do anything to make herself better so be it. Regardless, what you did was good for her to hear and good for you. It'll only light a fire under her ass. Whether she wants you back or not, you can at least say that you said the very thing you wanted to say to her and were honest about it. Time will tell if it works out, but otherwise, do ya thing bro. Best of luck to you.

Most of the time its not what you say its how you say it. Women can be fragile, and men as well, so you have to use the right words and do it appropriately. This dude dropped the sledge hammer, "baby, youre too big. Im sorry." Sensitive subject needs sensitive words if you're trying to really help and maintain a relationship.

Its how you say things. Some learn it when they are younger, some older, some never and they end up lonely because they are a**holes.

[Iron Mantis]

Is it just me, or are half the posters from this thread now a "banned user".

Either way, some of these responses are prices.

[Greenie]

It was a bad night. We tried having sex and I just wasnt into it. So we laid there for a minute and she finally asks me whays wrong. I tried to avoid the issue but she asked me if theres another woman. I said no. She again asks whats wrong then. I realized lying would be futile so I came out and just said "baby, youre too big. Im sorry." She got quiet for a second then started crying....like a 2 year old! I tried to comfort her but she pushed me off and told me to leave. So I did. We talked on my way home and she starts going crazy, saying its not the weight, Im fking another chick, blah blah. So I just said youre in denial and.something needs to be done or else this wont last. She said ok yeah, Il do something, its over. So I just hung up and went to bed. Havent heard from her today. Dont care if I do.

Welp, just read this bit. The girl is in denial and her confidence is clearly hurt. If she can't handle the truth and doesn't do anything to make herself better so be it. Regardless, what you did was good for her to hear and good for you. It'll only light a fire under her ass. Whether she wants you back or not, you can at least say that you said the very thing you wanted to say to her and were honest about it. Time will tell if it works out, but otherwise, do ya thing bro. Best of luck to you.

Most of the time its not what you say its how you say it. Women can be fragile, and men as well, so you have to use the right words and do it appropriately. This dude dropped the sledge hammer, "baby, youre too big. Im sorry." Sensitive subject needs sensitive words if you're trying to really help and maintain a relationship.

Its how you say things. Some learn it when they are younger, some older, some never and they end up lonely because they are a**holes.

Exactly. Even in this situation he ended up missing her after he did that. Now how do you go back and try to mend that? How does he even approach her to tell her he misses her? Mess. Mess. Mess.

...and the fact that some posters applauded the way he did it is disturbing.
What if your woman did that too you while y'all getting it in? Imagine that for a second.

Did she need to be told in some way? Yes. She did. 40lbs is alarming though. Was she sick? Pregnant? I've never heard of a person simply putting on 40 pounds that quick unless something else was going on.

Anywho. I hope he's happy and all is okay.

[Greenie]

Is it just me, or are half the posters from this thread now a "banned user".

Either way, some of these responses are prices.

We will all one day share the same fate.

[Iron Mantis]

Is it just me, or are half the posters from this thread now a "banned user".

Either way, some of these responses are prices.

We will all one day share the same fate.

It's only a matter of time

[NY2TheBay]

Welp, just read this bit. The girl is in denial and her confidence is clearly hurt. If she can't handle the truth and doesn't do anything to make herself better so be it. Regardless, what you did was good for her to hear and good for you. It'll only light a fire under her ass. Whether she wants you back or not, you can at least say that you said the very thing you wanted to say to her and were honest about it. Time will tell if it works out, but otherwise, do ya thing bro. Best of luck to you.

Most of the time its not what you say its how you say it. Women can be fragile, and men as well, so you have to use the right words and do it appropriately. This dude dropped the sledge hammer, "baby, youre too big. Im sorry." Sensitive subject needs sensitive words if you're trying to really help and maintain a relationship.

Its how you say things. Some learn it when they are younger, some older, some never and they end up lonely because they are a**holes.

Exactly. Even in this situation he ended up missing her after he did that. Now how do you go back and try to mend that? How does he even approach her to tell her he misses her? Mess. Mess. Mess.

...and the fact that some posters applauded the way he did it is disturbing.
What if your woman did that too you while y'all getting it in? Imagine that for a second.

Did she need to be told in some way? Yes. She did. 40lbs is alarming though. Was she sick? Pregnant? I've never heard of a person simply putting on 40 pounds that quick unless something else was going on.

Anywho. I hope he's happy and all is okay.

Only real way out, dude puts on 20-40lbs as fast as possible, shows up and says I am here for you and lets go workout and go on hikes together. He better have some roses, too.

I personally would like to help her, train her to physically be better than she was and then have her flaunt it in front of him and curve him hard. But thats just me, I'd get great joy out of seeing the dudes reaction.

My girl aint doing that to me. But, I hear you.

But from the guy's perspective here, she gave up on herself and wasn't trying to look good for her man. That can be viewed as disrespectful and I don't applaud that. However, waiting for her to stack on 40lb's then drop a hammer like he did, is flat out childish.

[Capn'O]

Is it just me, or are half the posters from this thread now a "banned user".

Either way, some of these responses are prices.

We will all one day share the same fate.

It will be the glorious day I log into a KnicksGod's account.

[Carl_Karlson]

I told my girl today that we should workout together...she straight shot it down

[Iron Mantis]

I told my girl today that we should workout together...she straight shot it down

[Greenie]

Most of the time its not what you say its how you say it. Women can be fragile, and men as well, so you have to use the right words and do it appropriately. This dude dropped the sledge hammer, "baby, youre too big. Im sorry." Sensitive subject needs sensitive words if you're trying to really help and maintain a relationship.

Its how you say things. Some learn it when they are younger, some older, some never and they end up lonely because they are a**holes.

Exactly. Even in this situation he ended up missing her after he did that. Now how do you go back and try to mend that? How does he even approach her to tell her he misses her? Mess. Mess. Mess.

...and the fact that some posters applauded the way he did it is disturbing.
What if your woman did that too you while y'all getting it in? Imagine that for a second.

Did she need to be told in some way? Yes. She did. 40lbs is alarming though. Was she sick? Pregnant? I've never heard of a person simply putting on 40 pounds that quick unless something else was going on.

Anywho. I hope he's happy and all is okay.

Only real way out, dude puts on 20-40lbs as fast as possible, shows up and says I am here for you and lets go workout and go on hikes together. He better have some roses, too.

I personally would like to help her, train her to physically be better than she was and then have her flaunt it in front of him and curve him hard. But thats just me, I'd get great joy out of seeing the dudes reaction.

My girl aint doing that to me. But, I hear you.

But from the guy's perspective here, she gave up on herself and wasn't trying to look good for her man. That can be viewed as disrespectful and I don't applaud that. However, waiting for her to stack on 40lb's then drop a hammer like he did, is flat out childish.

I'm not absolving her from a thing. She needs to take care of herself. It must be for herself though. I hope she went to the doctor to she if somthing was going on health wise as to why she put on that much weight so quickly. If nothing was wrong with her health wise she needs to get naked and look in a mirror real hard and decide if that's what she wants to be.

If not, she needs to get it in gear. Go to a nutritionist and have them map out a eating plan specifically for her and join a few classes at the local gym. Do things that are fun and active. I for one, love playing tennis I bust my husbands ass every Sunday.

If she's cool with how she looks....IDK what to tell ya.

[NY2TheBay]

Exactly. Even in this situation he ended up missing her after he did that. Now how do you go back and try to mend that? How does he even approach her to tell her he misses her? Mess. Mess. Mess.

...and the fact that some posters applauded the way he did it is disturbing.
What if your woman did that too you while y'all getting it in? Imagine that for a second.

Did she need to be told in some way? Yes. She did. 40lbs is alarming though. Was she sick? Pregnant? I've never heard of a person simply putting on 40 pounds that quick unless something else was going on.

Anywho. I hope he's happy and all is okay.

Only real way out, dude puts on 20-40lbs as fast as possible, shows up and says I am here for you and lets go workout and go on hikes together. He better have some roses, too.

I personally would like to help her, train her to physically be better than she was and then have her flaunt it in front of him and curve him hard. But thats just me, I'd get great joy out of seeing the dudes reaction.

My girl aint doing that to me. But, I hear you.

But from the guy's perspective here, she gave up on herself and wasn't trying to look good for her man. That can be viewed as disrespectful and I don't applaud that. However, waiting for her to stack on 40lb's then drop a hammer like he did, is flat out childish.

I'm not absolving her from a thing. She needs to take care of herself. It must be for herself though. I hope she went to the doctor to she if somthing was going on health wise as to why she put on that much weight so quickly. If nothing was wrong with her health wise she needs to get naked and look in a mirror real hard and decide if that's what she wants to be.

If not, she needs to get it in gear. Go to a nutritionist and have them map out a eating plan specifically for her and join a few classes at the local gym. Do things that are fun and active. I for one, love playing tennis I bust my husbands ass every Sunday.

If she's cool with how she looks....IDK what to tell ya.

Yeah, the health thing could be the culprit. But if we are keeping it real drugs and alcohol can get the best of even dimes with good genes. Seen it before, this could easily be the case.

Serena on sundays, I see you. Hope you ain't out there gruntin tho

[Greenie]

Only real way out, dude puts on 20-40lbs as fast as possible, shows up and says I am here for you and lets go workout and go on hikes together. He better have some roses, too.

I personally would like to help her, train her to physically be better than she was and then have her flaunt it in front of him and curve him hard. But thats just me, I'd get great joy out of seeing the dudes reaction.

My girl aint doing that to me. But, I hear you.

But from the guy's perspective here, she gave up on herself and wasn't trying to look good for her man. That can be viewed as disrespectful and I don't applaud that. However, waiting for her to stack on 40lb's then drop a hammer like he did, is flat out childish.

I'm not absolving her from a thing. She needs to take care of herself. It must be for herself though. I hope she went to the doctor to she if somthing was going on health wise as to why she put on that much weight so quickly. If nothing was wrong with her health wise she needs to get naked and look in a mirror real hard and decide if that's what she wants to be.

If not, she needs to get it in gear. Go to a nutritionist and have them map out a eating plan specifically for her and join a few classes at the local gym. Do things that are fun and active. I for one, love playing tennis I bust my husbands ass every Sunday.

If she's cool with how she looks....IDK what to tell ya.

Yeah, the health thing could be the culprit. But if we are keeping it real drugs and alcohol can get the best of even dimes with good genes. Seen it before, this could easily be the case.

Serena on sundays, I see you. Hope you ain't out there gruntin tho

True.

Nah, I'm not a grunter...LOL