Timber Trolls

[packforfreedom]

Watch on YouTube

Hero

[SkyhookinUrMom]

Cool. Now we only need Beasley and Tolliver.

Play it again, Sam

[Shaka_Zulu]

I am so happy about this.

Watch on YouTube

Watch on YouTube

They're so good!

This **** is epically perfect, why I havent I seen them before

[El Hespiritu]

Corey Cabrewer (roughly transl: GOATrewer) is now at New Orleans in the department of Players Development.

What could possibly go wrong?

I foresee Kira Lewis (the fastest man from this Draft) opting to ROY.
Or to next USA representative for 100 metres hurdles at next Tokyo Olympics... both works for me.

[urinesane]

I am so happy about this.

Watch on YouTube

Watch on YouTube

They're so good!

This **** is epically perfect, why I havent I seen them before

You joined too late! These were what got us through some cold nights.

[PharmD]

Watch on YouTube

They're so good!

This **** is epically perfect, why I havent I seen them before

You joined too late! These were what got us through some cold nights.

Here's my favorite one from when the wolves were maximally putrid

Watch on YouTube

[Klomp]

Read on Twitter

[El Hespiritu]

Troll Early Takes on the Late pre Season:

-DLo's hairstyle is a vintage reenact inspired by Nubian peasants from around II Century b.c.

-Jugancho Layman is in fact a sole entity with mostly the exact same display at court, doppleganged in two.
Just one of them is blonder.
They should share lineup more often....that would increase their current numbers by two so boxscores can notice they exist.

-I'm in doubt about nicknaming Malik Fumao II* (Fumao I is Michael Beasley) or Motivao II** (The one is Pat Beverly).

-The Rapper Who Became Baller Just For The Lulz is a good nickname for the rookie but maybe too long.

-To take one of the best game-running PGs of the League in his prime and turn him into a bench player to mentorize younglings is the trollest thing ever happened to RR along his entire career aside that dunk he made during an exhibition game with Spain National Team three years ago.

-KAT is trying hard to bring some tough defense to the table and at times here and there...
...He even does it!!
I swear.
I know it sounds troll af, but he actually does.


(N from T)
* (Stoned, Smoky)
** (Motivated, Aroused, Emotionally Invested)

[El Hespiritu]

(Freely quoted from Bull Durham-Ron Shelton, 1988-)

-How many games we won so far?
-Two.
-Two!!?? I can hardly believe it!
-It's a miracle.

Let's pray when true RS starts we grew enough as a team to (sorta) compete.



Official TimberTroll b.C. thread is now actively debating focused on RR (deceiving) display so far.
Unofficial TimberTroll a.C. thread is now mainly silent or at times ranting about general NBA.

I'm mainly silent or at times ranting about general NBA.
But I'm conocting painful bricks in the shadows ready to be thrown to incautious ones in due time.

Hope the team is doing the same with defense.

[El Hespiritu]

Bricking...

Normally, I would be declaring Late Pre Season oficially finished and beginning of true Regular Season around these dates.

Problem it's can see no evidence of that at court.

A lot of games still looking far more SummerLeague-squean than pre-deadliners and that's not only happening here in the tundra.
I'm watching games from many other teams aside TimberTrolls and everybody out there is completely out of rhythm, both individual and collectively.

I foresee a weird Regular Season, with tons of ups and downs on every Division, supposed tank-teams sneaking into PO spots and supposed contenders struggling to avoid the Play-in.

We're sucking more than the rest mostly because we're playing worse than the rest but nobody is actually nailing it... I'd maybe spare Utah and LAL, each one at its own style but having serious doubts about MormonTrolls' minimalistic rotation long term.
And all of that are good news:

On any normal, decent and catholical season, any Facepalm Machine Of A Team (that's us) can do nothing but endlessly suck.
But this is the CoronaSeason Year I (last was 0). Nothing is normal, decent or catholical.


Protocols are decimating rosters day in day out... we even sent a star to quarantine in the middle of a game.
And mark my words: even more bizarre things are about to happen.
Were Bruce Bowen or KG still playing, I'm sure they would invent some underyourskin tricks sorta 'snooze-hack' or 'cough-boxout'.

If a joke of a team can make something any different than ashaming the fanbase... this is the perfect season to make it.

It will be a messy, chaotical and odd Season
We're a messy, chaotical and odd team.

This season has been designed to benefit teams like us.
We just need to troll harder.

This Is The Way


Addendum: Our defense got better these last games, btw.
It has been upgraded from Cringe to Dizzy But At Least Well-Intended

Might it seem a tiny deed but I think is positive.

[avempace]

And in the meantime the admins of the troll's forum dont bother to activate my account and I am forced to stay here in the wilderness with all these zombie posters. Arizona felt a bit warmer (not sure why), I dont say anything about Utah forums, they are weird, they have some strange obsession with sisters over there. Anyway, lets ignore the games until now, they didnt happen.

[El Hespiritu]

I'm sorry, avempace... wish I could help.

ALERT: BRICK IN PROCESS

For the first time, RR will face the franchise who fired him.
He was not happy about that. Sput some words to James Jones back in time.

He has some history of doing great agains ex-teams... some vengeaful hidden side of his personality, I guess (totally subconscious).
Let's hope so; that could be a factor to get at least one game with something similar to competitivity and blood in the eye.

Probably I'll watch it live... I thought to post an update about Ttrolls nicknames-
I wrote a scounting* anal ysis of the roster at the Spanish Forum.

Too brick to translate: I make a summary to highlight the nicknames.
Those are my personal nicknames for some of them, mark you. Other users prefer another nicknames or none at all.
I try to adapt them to English or not if I'm in the mood.


Dlo Nubian Peasant (this one will eventually change when his hair-styler has a new inspiration I bet)


Cul Verd Cross-words... in Catalan language means literally 'Green Ass' (what he is).


Fumotivao Roughly: 'I'm motivated and high af!'


Blondie Jugancho Layman Because...


Brunette Jugancho Layman You get it I guess.


Baldbeardie Self-explanatory. Lovely guy.


Nowell No nick. Maybe if he ever does something weird enough...


Jaden No nick... yet. When I Iook to his face I know he'll do odd stuff sooner or later. Gushing while waiting.


Edavis Didn't overwork, here.


Chicken Legs Naizde, at times.


Okogie Hardly our most imaginative season, I know.


The rapper ...who became baller just out of the lulz. I call him Ant as well.


Vandarra In Catalan could be read: 'gansta' 'low-life thug'. Vando is OK tho.


Pueblos I think you knew this one. We call him KAT too.


RR I used to call him The Golden Boy but it's too long.


This is what Fincho gets:

-Barely 4 guys in the whole roster can play tough defense.
-There's a franchise-guy hardly a leader and a theoretical 2nd fiddle guy ranting as an alpha dog ('I'm the only clutcher here').
-Bench PGs run the team better than starting PG. One of them, by a mile.
-Repeated cards. Players with basically same skillset for same positions.
-Tons, tons and tons of unexperienced talented boys trying to find minutes to develope into men.
-Even if they are mostly nice guys, who can get a good chemistry at the locker-room, they are tough to split in functional 5-men units with a good fit between them.
-Locker-room walls painted with deception, failure and loss since more of an entire NBA generation (with a single one-season Butleresquian hiatus)... most of the guys who did the first strokes are retired yet.

Well... good luck with that.

-If Fincho's job is to get W, he has the most difficult job in the League (ask Ryan).
-If Fincho's job is to protect a pick, he has the easiest job in the League (ask GRose).

Fincho (I guess you'd spell it finch-ou) is an abbrv. of Fincho Blancuno (roughly: Whitey Kebab).
But I'll go just with Fincho and I'll spare the color thing 'cause I wasn't specially interested into the kind of stuff that came out when his contract was announced.


*At times it's hard for us to differenciate typos from creative English, or Spanish or whatever language

[Calinks]

I don't think this is Timbertrolls but it is Timbertrolls worthy!

https://www.reddit.com/r/timberwolves/comments/ofn0u1/the_dk_rap_but_its_the_minnesota_timberwolves/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

[El Hespiritu]

O Dear...

[LibertyPrime]

O Dear...

I'm just sorry you guys are going to have to watch Cavs ball next year....then again, after watching Wolves ball this year, that might actually be a step up.

[El Hespiritu]

Mixed feelings right now...

[Note30]

Mixed feelings right now...

I'd be surprised if the Cavs keep Ricky

[El Hespiritu]

If they wanna keep Love and trade Sexton, makes some sense RR stays at CLE.

[El Hespiritu]

Updating...

CLECaus stuff ended up far better than nobody expected-
Ricky was playing his best basketball ever.
And then he got done for the season.

Why am I not surprised?

We are currently ghost-bandwagoning Indiana.
We know he'll probably never put a foot there but Nomadism has rules.

I just saw your injury report for tomorrow.

Did them got into a fight inside the locker-room or somewhat?

QUESTIONABLE
Beverley - Right Ankle Sprain
Okogie - Right Quad Contusion
Prince - Left Ankle Sprain
Reid - Right Knee Contusion
Russell - Left Shin Contusion

OUT
Wright IV - Left UCL Injury

[Biff Cooper]

Go Indiana!